Sooner or later, everyone faces the pain of losing someone close to them. It’s one of the hardest parts of life, something no one can fully prepare for. While grief touches each person differently, there’s a shared experience that many people have—dreaming about the loved ones who have passed away. These dreams often feel incredibly real, leaving us to wonder whether there’s a deeper meaning behind them.
Losing someone you love is heartbreaking. Everyone copes with loss in their own way. Some cry openly and often, while others withdraw and suffer in silence. There are those who try to stay busy to avoid thinking about their pain, and others who act as if nothing has changed. But no matter how people grieve, many report having dreams in which the person they’ve lost appears—alive, healthy, and often delivering a message. This has led some to ask: can dreams really be a way for our deceased loved ones to communicate with us?
Patrick McNamara, an associate professor of neurology and psychiatry at Boston University School of Medicine, has studied this phenomenon and given it a name: visitation dreams. According to McNamara, a visitation dream is one in which someone who has died appears to the grieving individual in a vivid, lifelike way. These dreams can feel so real that you wake up with the overwhelming sense that you’ve just spoken with your loved one.
McNamara, who blogs under the name Dream Catcher for Psychology Today, has shared many insights about dreams and their meanings. Over time, he has come to believe that visitation dreams play a significant role in the grieving process. He describes his own personal experience after the loss of his parents. In one powerful dream, they visited him. Despite his scientific background and skepticism, he couldn’t deny the feeling that he had truly connected with them. He later wrote, “Now if I, an individual who studied dreams with a skeptical scientific cast of mind, could not shake the conviction that I had just communicated with my dead parents, how much stronger must be the conviction of someone with a less skeptical approach to dreams than me?”
McNamara isn’t alone in his interest in these powerful experiences. Other researchers have studied dreams of the deceased and found similar patterns. A 2014 study published in the American Journal of Hospice and Palliative Care explored the phenomenon of grief dreams. The study found that these dreams are common, emotionally impactful, and often help the grieving process. People reported dreaming about happy memories with their loved ones, seeing them healthy and at peace, and even receiving messages from them. These dreams brought comfort and, in many cases, a sense of healing.
In 2016, Canadian researchers conducted a study with 76 middle-aged adults who had lost loved ones. Their findings revealed that 67.1% of the participants said their dreams helped strengthen their belief in an afterlife. Around 70% considered these dreams as “visitations,” and 71% said the dreams made them feel closer to the person who had died. For many, these dreams were more than just memories—they were moments of deep connection that brought reassurance and peace.
Psychologist Jennifer E. Shorter, from the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology in Palo Alto, California, has also studied this unique phenomenon. In her work titled “Visitation Dreams in Grieving Individuals: A Phenomenological Inquiry into the Relationship Between Dreams and the Grieving,” she explored what characterizes these types of dreams. Her research showed that visitation dreams are not limited to a specific time after someone has passed. They can happen shortly after the death or even years later.
Shorter identified four main features that commonly appear in visitation dreams. First, the deceased typically appears as they did in life, although often healthier, younger, or more vibrant. Second, the loved one usually offers reassurance—letting you know they are okay or at peace. Third, the communication is often not verbal but instead feels telepathic, as if you just “know” what they are trying to say. Lastly, these dreams are usually peaceful and feel structured, as though they carry a deeper spiritual or emotional harmony.
What makes visitation dreams so compelling is not only the vividness but also the emotional weight they carry. People often wake up from these dreams with a deep sense of comfort, even joy, and sometimes a renewed sense of hope. For others, the experience can be bittersweet—a reminder of the person they’ve lost but also a gift that offers a sense of closeness once again.
These dreams may not provide all the answers, but they open the door to meaningful reflection. Whether you believe they are messages from beyond or simply your mind’s way of processing grief, there’s no denying the powerful emotional impact they leave behind.
Have you ever dreamed of someone who has passed away? Did it bring you peace, or did it raise questions that lingered long after you woke up? For many, these dreams become treasured experiences that help them cope and even grow emotionally. They offer a different kind of closure, one that words or rituals sometimes can’t provide.
If you’ve had a visitation dream or know someone who has, consider sharing the experience. These stories have the power to connect us in our shared humanity, reminding us that even in loss, love continues in surprising and mysterious ways. And if this article resonates with you, share it with others on Facebook—it may just be the comfort someone else needs today.
