For Michelle Obama, learning how to say “no” has become a defining part of her latest chapter in life. The former First Lady has been open about her personal growth after President Barack Obama’s second term ended and their family left the White House. A major part of that journey has been making choices based on what is best for her, which explains why Michelle notably skipped President Donald Trump’s inauguration in January. During the April 23 episode of her podcast, “IMO With Michelle Obama & Craig Robinson,” she discussed with her brother Craig Robinson how her decision to prioritize herself was met with harsh criticism and speculation. “My decision to skip the inauguration—or my decision to make choices at the beginning of this year that suited me—were met with such ridicule and criticism,” Michelle shared. “People couldn’t believe I was saying no for any reason other than some imagined marital issues. They assumed my marriage was falling apart.”

Despite rumors suggesting marital troubles, Michelle, now 61, firmly emphasized that her choice was entirely her own. “I’m here really trying to own my life and intentionally practice making the choice that was right for me,” she said. “It took everything in my power not to do what was perceived as right, but instead, to do what truly felt right for me.” Though she was confident in her decision, Michelle admitted it wasn’t easy. She even “tricked” herself into not attending by not preparing an outfit, something she usually does for significant events. “It started with not having anything to wear,” she said. “Because I’m always prepared for anything—a funeral, a surprise event—I travel with clothes just in case. So I told my team, ‘I don’t even want to have a dress ready,’” she explained.

Michelle, who shares daughters Malia, 26, and Sasha, 23, with Barack, also spoke about the deep self-reflection she’s undergone since leaving the White House. She noted how critical it has been to prioritize herself after years of public service. “I’m at this stage in life where I have to define my life on my terms for the first time,” she said. “What happened during those eight years we lived in the White House? What did it do to me, internally, to my soul?”

She reflected further, “We made it through. We got out alive. I hope we made the country proud. My girls, thank God, are whole. But what happened to me?” Through therapy, Michelle has worked to unravel these questions. She also began unlearning old patterns of thought that pushed her toward constant striving. “Going through therapy is getting me to recognize that maybe, finally, I’m good enough,” she revealed. “Now I’m trying to actively practice something different, to rewire those neurons in my head that make me keep pushing and striving. And part of that practice includes saying ‘no’ intentionally.”

Meanwhile, Trump’s 2025 inauguration featured a range of attendees. Barron Trump joined his parents, Melania and Donald Trump, at St. John’s Church for services. Ivanka Trump also attended the church service, dressed formally for the occasion. President Joe Biden and First Lady Jill Biden were seen welcoming the Trumps at the White House, extending a gracious gesture despite their political differences.

Vice President Kamala Harris and Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff welcomed incoming Vice President JD Vance and his wife Usha Vance. Tiffany Trump, who is pregnant, attended the church service with her husband Michael Boulos. Ivanka Trump was also joined by her husband Jared Kushner and their children Arabella, Joseph, and Theodore.

Among the notable guests, Elon Musk arrived at the Capitol Rotunda and was seen mingling with Google CEO Sundar Pichai. Minnesota Senator Amy Klobuchar, who chaired the Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies, led President Biden and Trump out of the White House, emphasizing her commitment to ensuring the event’s success despite political differences. Former Presidents and First Ladies, including Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, George W. Bush, and Laura Bush, attended the ceremony. Barack Obama was present as well, though he mingled with the Bush family, given Michelle’s absence.

Former Vice President Mike Pence attended the inauguration alone, while New York City Mayor Eric Adams worked the room at the Capitol. Canadian hockey legend Wayne Gretzky and his wife Janet Jones also made an appearance. Former Fox Corporation chairman Rupert Murdoch attended with his wife Elena Zhukova, and Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Trump’s pick for Secretary of Health and Human Services, was among the audience.

Senator Mitch McConnell and his wife Elaine Chao were present, along with social media influencers turned entertainers Jake Paul and Logan Paul. Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg joined Amazon’s Jeff Bezos and his fiancée Lauren Sanchez at the Capitol, alongside Sundar Pichai and Elon Musk.

Trump’s children—Ivanka, Donald Trump Jr., and Eric Trump—were seen gathered with Ivanka’s husband Jared Kushner. Barron Trump, now a student at New York University, traveled to Washington, D.C., to support his father’s second oath of office. Opera tenor Christopher Macchio performed the National Anthem, although he noted the absence of the usual massive crowds.

TikTok CEO Shou Zi Chew made a surprising appearance just hours after TikTok briefly went dark in the U.S. Apple CEO Tim Cook was spotted with former presidential candidate Vivek Ramaswamy and South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem. Melania Trump and Donald Trump shared a candid moment under her Eric Javits hat.

JD Vance took his oath of office as Vice President with his wife Usha and daughter Mirabel watching proudly. Former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani captured the lively atmosphere of the day. Shortly after Vance’s swearing-in, Trump took his second oath of office.

Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders was present, choosing a lighter outfit compared to his famously bundled look from the previous inauguration. Singer Carrie Underwood performed “America the Beautiful” a cappella after technical issues, impressing the crowd with her powerful voice. Michelle Obama’s choice to prioritize her well-being, and the contrast between her absence and the bustling inauguration events, highlights a larger journey of self-awareness, resilience, and empowerment.